Are you a food nerd?

Someone asked me today what qualifies one as a “food nerd”. After a good, hard (30 second) think, this is my response.

Here is a 5-point scoring system to find out if you’re a food nerd. If you answer “yes” to at least 4 of the 5 of the following, you are a “food nerd”:

1. Love eating and drinking… obviously.
2. Plan your day around the meals you eat and/or plan your social activities based on proximity to good restaurants or food shops.
3. Become unreasonably despondent and moody when stuck in small towns or suburban food courts where all food choices are deemed “unworthy” of your standards.
4. Only retain historical, political, geographical, scientific and other important facts when they are food-related.
5. Have a “happy dance” that you pull out when exciting food opportunities arise.

Happy forking, fellow food nerds.

Forking Hiatus

Yippee! New job! The down side – it leaves me with little time to fork (much less forking write about it). Not usually one to prioritize work over forking, I’m taking a chance and testing the waters of full-time, full-on work. Wish me luck and allow me a brief hiatus from our forking sessions. I’ll be back with a vengeance, I promise!

Summertime Session #4: Chirashi-sushi

Summertime Forking Lesson #4: Get all torn up

(serves 4)

Feeling a bit torn up about all of your scandalous summer forking?  Dipped your noodle in too many sauces? With summer coming to an end, you may need to indulge in a little guilt-fest by forking this “torn-up” dish. Just like guilt (religious, sexual or otherwise) Chirashi (literally: “torn”) sushi is dead-easy, since it’s just an assortment of toppings on a bed of sushi rice – no rolling required. While sushi restaurants display gorgeous arrays of sashimi atop their glistening beds of rice, the humble Japanese housewife expresses torn-up feelings of guilt with the following: sushi rice mixed with boiled vegetables and topped with fish (if you like) shredded egg and nori (seaweed).  Are you a glutton for self-loathing? If so, here’s an easy way to get “all torn up”.

Ingredients for “All torn-up Chirashi Sushi”

Sushi Rice:

• 2 cups hot, cooked Japanese rice
• 4 Tbsp rice vinegar, 1 – 1.5 Tbsp sugar, depending on your taste, pinch of salt OR “sushinoko” powder (follow package directions for amount)

Toppings:

• Boiled vegetables: Your choice or combination of thinly sliced shiitake mushrooms, bamboo shoots, julienned carrots, and peas boiled in a broth of: ½ cup fish stock (“dashi”), 1 ½ Tbsp soy sauce, 1 tsp sugar, pinch salt
• Assorted sashimi (Totally optional. e.g. tuna, salmon, cooked shrimp, salmon roe, etc.)
• Shredded egg – 2 eggs, beaten
• Sushi nori – ½ sheet, shredded by hand or finely cut with scissors

How to make “All torn-up Chirashi Sushi”

1. Get in bed. The best place to retreat to when all torn up is a bed (of rice). Put on the rice to cook, and then get to prepping your toppings.
2. Make your veg limp.  You’ve been naughty all summer – it’s time to punish your veg. Bring the broth (as outlined in the “toppings” section) to a boil, and then boil each topping in turn, scooping the toppings out when limp and re-using the broth to boil each subsequent topping. Set your limp veg aside and allow it to cool.
3. Shred a tear. To make shredded egg, beat the eggs and make thin egg “crepes” by frying in a hot, lightly oiled pan. Hold the hot frying pan in one hand (by the handle, unless you are a glutton for punishment) and pour in the egg, swirling it around so that it creates a thin, flat sheet. When it’s cooked most of the way through, carefully flip it to cook the other side (I slide it out of the pan, then pick it up and place it back in on the flip side). Slide the crepe onto a cutting board, and cut it into 1-inch strips. Then, cut the strips cross-wise as thinly as you can, creating 1-inch long egg “sprinkles”. (If this is too much for you, just scramble the eggs instead, using chopsticks to mix up the egg as you cook, so as to create little bitty egg pieces.)
4. Get all cut up. Create shredded nori pieces by cutting the sheet of seaweed into 1-inch strips, then cutting cross-wise like you did the egg.
5. Salt (and vinegar) your wound. When the rice is cooked, it’s ready to be cooled and given a vinegar treatment. Mix the vinegar, sugar and salt, and then transfer the rice into a shallow dish – the shallower, the better (to allow for quick cooling). Drizzle the vinegar mixture over it, distributing it evenly, and then cool the rice by gently turning (not stirring!) it while fanning it at the same time. Do this until your fanning arm gives out and falls off or your rice is cooled, whichever comes first.
6. Get all mixed up inside. Add your limp (and by now, cooled) veg to the rice, and gently mix in.
7. Get topped. Transfer the rice/veg mixture to your serving platter, and then artfully arrange the shredded egg and seafood (if you’re using it) on top, sprinkling the whole thing with your shredded or cut nori.
8. Indulge in your guilt. Don’t listen to your therapist, being all torn up can be a beautiful thing, especially when expressed in artfully arranged chirashi sushi.

Summer Session #3: Zaru Udon (Cold Thick Noodles)

Summer Forking Lesson #3: How to Dip Your Thick Noodle

(serves 3 – 4)

If you’ve been following along in the summer sessions, you now are well (socially) lubricated and have managed to look good and stay cool while doing so. You’ve done the difficult part, now it’s time to get down to dipping your noodle. Zaru udon (cold thick noodles dipped in a soy-based sauce) make for perfect summer forking. Tasty, quick, and cold, you’ll easily have your noodle slipping and sliding just the way you like it. (Speaking of “just the way you like it”, if you find udon noodles have too much girth, you can replace the thick, white udon noodle with the thinner, darker soba.)

Ingredients for Zaru Udon

• 3 to 4 bundles of udon noodles

For the dipping sauce

• Boiling water, 2 Tbsp
• Dashi (fish or kelp stock) powder, ½ tsp
• Sugar, 1 Tbsp
• Cold water, 1 ½ cups
• Soy sauce, ¼ cup
• Mirin, 1 Tbsp
• Garnish: 2 green onions, chopped, and grated wasabi or ginger

How to make “Zaru Udon”

1. Get hot. Put on a large pot of water to boil (for the noodles). Meanwhile, in a medium-sized bowl (big enough for 2 cups of liquid) prep the cold dipping sauce by throwing in the dashi powder and sugar and a couple of tablespoons of boiling water stirring until the dashi and sugar dissolve. If you nick the boiling from the large pot, do so before putting the noodles in it! The starch from the noodles are not desired in your sauce.
2. Be saucy. To your dissolved sugar/dashi mixture, stir in the cold water, soy sauce, and mirin. Put the sauce into the fridge to chill.
3. Get your thick noodle ready. Once your water is boiling, dump in your udon noodles. While the noodles are boiling, prepare a large bowl of icy-cold water (add a dozen ice cubes if you have them) which you’ll use to chill the noodles.  Once the noodles are al dente (around 5 -6 minutes, depending on girth) drain them, rinse in cold water, and then dump into the ice-cold bath, shaking them around until they are nice and cold.
4. Present your noodle for dipping. Drain off the noodles and present each portion in a shallow serving bowl or, if you have it, a shallow woven basket (this is how the Japanese like to present their thick noodles). Pour out the chilled sauce into small bowls and garnish with chopped green onion and about 1 tsp of grated ginger or ½ tsp of grated wasabi per dish.
5. Get dipping. To eat – take a few noodles and drop them (gently, don’t splash!) into the sauce. When you fish them back out, they will be dripping in cool, salty, yumminess, perked up by a little kick of ginger or wasabi. Enjoy!

Special Bonus – Sloppy Seconds!

As an added bonus, you can have an amazing lunch or dinner the next day with leftover udon and sauce.

Yaki-udon: Fry the noodles up with some leftover veggies, meat or seafood. Add a little dissolved cornstarch to the sauce, and throw it on at the last minute, cooking until the sauce thicken.

Udon salad: Top your fave salad veggies and then pour on the sauce for a noodle salad. Add a bit of sesame oil for extra flavour.

Summertime Session #2: Summer Somen (Noodle) Salad

Summertime Forking Lesson #2: Look good, Stay cool

If you’ve completed Summer Session #1 (Sassy Sangria), then you are by now well lubricated (and possibly also inebriated) and ready for the next step – get out your noodle. This noodle salad is not only delicious and easy to make with whatever you happen to have on hand, even the most inexperienced forker can make it look good.  This one gets bonus points for a water-based (instead of oil-based) dressing – keeping things fresh and friendly to your waistline. Warning: this dish is extremely tasty, once created, prepare to beat off potential forking partners.

Salad: (Substitute with your favourite toppings, but stay fresh and light)

• Somen noodles, one bundle (rice noodles are a good substitute if you can’t find somen noodles)
• Cooked shrimp or crabmeat, about ½ – ¾ cup (optional)
• Thinly sliced, salt-massaged hard vegetable, about ½ – ¾ cup. I use cucumber, but you can use thinly sliced daikon radish, julienned carrot, etc.
• Roughly chopped soft leafy veg or herb, about ¼ – ½ cup. I used chopped shiso leaves, but you can use spinach, cilantro, butter lettuce, etc.
• Reconstituted dried wakame (kelp) (soak 1 Tbsp dry wakame in ¼ cup water for 5 minutes, and drain excess water once reconstituted)
• Daikon sprouts to garnish (optional)

Fresh Sesame-Ginger Dressing:

• Sushi vinegar, 1 Tbsp. (or rice vinegar, 1 Tbsp. + sugar, ½ tsp)
• Water, 2 Tbsp.
• Ponzu, 1 Tbsp.
• Sesame oil, 1 tsp.
• Grated fresh ginger, 1 tsp.

How to make Summer Somen Salad:

1. Give your hard veg a good massage. To soften up harder veg like cucumber, daikon, or carrot, julienne or slice them in paper-thin rounds, throw into a bowl, salt generously (about ½ – ¾ tsp. per 2 cups chopped veg.) and then massage (yes, massage) the salt into your veg. After a good going-over with the salt, your veg will start to weep (its moisture). Leave it to weep for 10 – 15 minutes, and then drain excess water, squeezing your veg to get out a good portion of the moisture.
2. Take out your noodle. While your veg is weeping, boil some noodles according to package directions. While they are boiling, prepare a large bowl of cold water with plenty of ice cubes. It sounds cruel, but once boiled, drain your noodles out in a colander, and then plunge them into the ice-water, using your hand to roughly and vigorously shake about your noodle. This will cool it right away and stop your noodle from becoming too limp. Refresh the ice-water, and keep noodles in cold water until ready to use.
3. Prepare your veg. Chop up your leafy veg, re-constitute the wakame (kelp).
4. Get on top. Strain your noodles, and pile them into a shallow bowl or plate.  Arrange the toppings artfully on the bed of noodles.
5. Lube up and caNoodle. Throw together the dressing ingredients, and pour on top or around the sides.  Present to your forking friends, and prepare for some canoodling.

This salad is so forking delicious, look at the hot people it attracted!

Summertime Session #1 – Sassy Sangria

Summer – the season of long, hot nights, and short, short skirts. With holidays galore and fresh fruit abounding, it’s the season to get your fork on. So, give me deepest attention, put on your shallowest hemline, and join me in a series of summertime forking sessions that is sure to leave you breathless.

Summertime forking lesson #1: Lubricant

Sometimes, in order to get your fork on, you’ll need a little (social) lubricant – I find that booze usually does the trick. Earlier this summer, despite living close to the beach during a hot spell, I found I was bereft of company. So I forked up this white wine sangria, and whaddaya know, 50 people showed up at my house to help me drink it! There are a gazillion variations on sangria (essentially wine, fruit, and soda/juice) so feel free to improvise in your own forking special way. The result of this recipe was sweet, light, (too) easy to drink, and even converted some hardcore red wine sangria drinkers to the light side. So as the first step in my summertime forking series, let’s get lubricated!

Ingredients for Sassy Sangria

• White Wine, 1 bottle: selected as you would a one-night stand (i.e. cheap and available)
• Fruit, 4 cups: sliced nectarines, strawberries, and frozen white grapes (they make for ice cubes)
• Vodka (optional)
• Juices, 1 cup each: White cranberry juice and soda water
• Garnish: mint sprigs
• Cubed ice, 2 – 3 cups

How to make “Sassy Sangria”

1. Prepare yourself for lubrication. Slice up nectarines, strawberries, and freeze the grapes. If you have some vodka and a bit of time, soak the nectarines and strawberries in some vodka for a few hours.
2. Put the “punch” in your punchbowl. Throw everything together and serve in clear glasses with a sprig of mint for best presentation. Enjoy the fruits (of your labour).

Ashlie’s Cheesy Balls (served warm)

(serves 1 – 15)

Have you been asked to a pot-luck and don’t know what to bring? Like me, you might have your standby forking pot-luck dishes – your fruit salads, bean dips, or guacamole with chips. BORING! My friend Ashlie’s standby is much more exciting – that’s why I got her to show me her balls. Her sundried tomato and goats cheese balls. Dead easy to make, and delicious in every way, they are also good for friends who are forking gluten and lactose intolerant (goat’s cheese is friendly to lactose-phobic bellies).

Ashlie’s balls are a hit at parties, especially if you take a little extra care with the forking presentation. At the latest gathering, she brought out her hot balls elegantly surrounded by grapes, and before you know it, the ladies had practically licked those balls clean off the plate!

Ingredients:

• 1/4 cup chopped sun dried tomatoes packed in oil
• 1 clove garlic
• 1 tsp grated lemon peel
• 2 Tbsp chopped fresh dill
• 200g chevre (soft goat cheese)
• Topping: ¾ – 1 cup of chopped cashews or pecans

How to make “Ashlie’s Cheesy Balls”:

1. Be smooth. Puree until smooth (or almost smooth) all of the ingredients except for the cheese and nuts.
   

   Ashlie making her balls

2. Be Cheesy. Add the cheese to your mix and pulse until blended. If your cheese is too stiff to blend, then add a little lemon juice or oil from the sundried tomatoes to soften it up. Taste and adjust to your liking with more garlic, lemon peel, or dill.
3. Be Ballsy. Turn out the cheesy mix onto a large piece of plastic wrap and shape into a ball. I find it’s easiest to line a very round bowl with the wrap and scoop the cheese into it – the bowl does most of the work for you. You can make one large ball or two small ones
4. Be Chill. Chill your ball(s) in the fridge for a few hours (or a ½ hour in the freezer if you’re stuck on time).
5. Be Nutty. Once chilled and firm, unwrap your balls and prepare the chopped nuts on a plate. Roll your balls in the nuts until they are encrusted.
6. Be Warm. Place your cheesy balls onto a pie plate or other baking dish with sides (just in case of melting) and bake at 375 for 12 – 15 minutes for one large ball, 7 – 10 minutes for two small. Check often to make sure your balls aren’t melting. They should be warmed through, but still firm.
7. Present your balls. Arrange your balls on a platter with crackers, grapes, and anything else you think might complement your salty, tangy balls. These balls are so good, you might just eat them all yourself – remember that you’ll also get a lot of pleasure by letting others enjoy your balls!

Recipe originally from Dana McCauley’s “Pantry Raid”

Graeme’s Lemon Coriander Rubbed Fish

(serves 4 – 5)

Have you ever been confronted by fish and not known what to do with it? As a long-time vegetarian and recent pescatarian, I am often intimidated by fish. My friend Graeme, on the other hand, is a long-time veteran of forking fish, and gave me a quick tip on how to take my fish from floppy flounder to flavourful fillet – by rubbing it! The dry rub is a super simple technique to add to your arsenal of forking techniques, and will get you forking fantastic results. Warm, juicy, and full of flavour, once you try this recipe, you’ll be running around rubbing all kinds of fish! Just be sure to wash your hands after.

Ingredients:

Fish

• 1kg boneless salmon fillet (skin removed) is suggested, but you can fork with fish of other varieties, too. Firm fish with a stronger flavour are best to stand up to the spices in the rub. Ever-mindful of food miles, Graeme used local rainbow trout.

Dry Rub

• ½ Tbsp Paprika (smoked, if you have it)
• ½ Tbsp lemon zest
• ½ Tbsp crushed coriander seeds (or anise or fennel)
• ½ Tbsp sugar (you can use brown sugar if you like)
• ½ Tbsp salt
• ½ teaspoon black pepper

How to make “Lemon Coriander Rubbed Fish”

1. Get warmed up: Pre-heat the oven to 425°F (220°C).
2. Prepare to rub: Combine all of the dry rub ingredients in a bowl.
3. Get lubed (if you like): Line a baking sheet with parchment paper, and depending on the moisture of your fish, you may want to lube up the surface of your fish with a little olive oil for easy forking. Rub the fish with the prepared rub.
4. Get your fish forking hot: Bake for about 15 – 20 minutes (depends on thickness) until the fish flakes.
5. Fork that fish!

Recipe adapted from “Bonnie Stern’s essentials of home cooking”

Hands-on forking with fish – Temaki Sushi

Want to impress? Learn how to fork fish with your hands. Not only is this presentation attractive, it’s actually easier to accomplish than sushi rolls. And what’s best – your guests can also get in on the fish-forking action. They do all the work, and you’ll get all the credit for this hands-on forking experience. And your lady-friend? Putty in your dextrous hands…

Ingredients:

• Sheets of “nori” (seaweed) cut into roughly 3 ½ “ squares
• rice
• sushi vinegar or “sushinoko” powder (don’t breathe in this powder – it’s essentially powdered vinegar and burns if you breathe it in!)
• your fave fillings (sashimi-quality tuna, salmon, scallops, shrimp, fish eggs [ikura or tobiko are recommended], crab or crab salad, julienned cucumber , sliced avocado, “shiso” leaves, etc.)
• soy sauce, wasabi, and Japanese mayonnaise

How to make Temaki Sushi:

1. Prepare the bed (of rice) and get lubed up. Cook Japanese rice ( 1 and 1/3 cups of water for each cup of rice – err on the side of less water for sushi rice.) When it’s cooked and still piping hot, spoon it out onto a flat baking sheet or large platter, and sprinkle with the sushi vinegar or sushinoko powder. Here is the trick to good sushi rice – fan it cool while gently turning (not stirring!) the rice with a flat spatula. You have to cool it down quickly so that it keeps firm. When you’re preparing a bed for fish, always… always, think firm.
2. Ready your filling. No matter the size or shape of your filling, for successful forking with raw fish, it’s all about presentation. I know that many people are intimidated by presentation, but don’t be scared, even those monkeys with red bums are good at presenting.  Just get a nice dish, take a little care in how you lay out your veg, and you’re set for some full-on, hands-on forking with fish.
3. Get hands-on. Now for the fun (and participatory) part. Take the piece of nori and place on it a small amount of rice (too much rice is the usual culprit for bad temaki sushi) flattening it out.  Squirt on a little mayo, arrange the fillings diagonally across the square, and then roll into a cone.
4. Eat it. Mmmmm… get saucy and get that fish right into your mouth. Recipe by: Hana

Forking Connected to Japanese groceries in Vancouver

Are you a Vancouverite who wants to do some Asian-style forking? Can’t find the ingredients at your local Safeway, or want the real deal and not some knock-off “Asian” brand? (Note to new Asian forkers – a red label emblazoned with “brush stroke” calligraphy does not an authentic taste ensure – get the real thing.)

Many of you will know Fujiya which has locations downtown, in East Van and in Richmond, but for those of you on the West Side of Vancouver, there is no need to drive across a bridge or head over to the other side of town if all you need are some Japanese staples.

iiConnections (no website, sorry) is a little Japanese market selling staple items like rice, noodles, sauces, seasonings and pickles, as well as Japanese treats, some knick-knacks, and frozen fish for sashimi/sushi. Run by a forking friendly Japanese family-man, I encourage those of you living out near UBC to visit iiConnections at 3780 West 10th Ave. And if there is ever anything he doesn’t have, he can usually order it in!

Happy forking, Vancouver!